Is it okay to have an ordinary life?
By No Rush · Updated November 8, 2026
The short answer
Yes. An ordinary life can be a good one. Amit Bhattacharjee and Cassie Mogilner ran eight studies and found that ordinary moments, like a meal with a friend, bring people more happiness as they get older. Younger people lean toward the rare and exciting. Ask whether the push for something bigger is yours, or something you picked up from others.
What does it mean to live an ordinary life?
Mostly it means days that look alike: work, meals, the same few people, small plans. Amit Bhattacharjee and Cassie Mogilner call ordinary experiences the common and frequent ones, like a coffee you like or a walk after dinner. Extraordinary ones are rare, like a big trip or a concert you waited months for. Both kinds made people happy in their studies. Which kind weighed more depended on age.
Is being extraordinary a good thing?
For some people it is, at some point in life. In those eight studies, younger people got the most happiness out of rare, big moments, and used them to describe who they were. Older people got as much out of everyday things, like a good breakfast, as out of rare ones. So did people who felt their time was short. Wanting something big at 24 is common, and wanting less of it later is common too.
Is it okay to just live a simple life?
Yes, and what you aim for may matter more than how big it looks. Tim Kasser and Richard Ryan asked adults and students what they wanted most in life. People who put money, looks and fame first felt less content and less full of energy. People who put close relationships, growing as a person and helping others first felt better. A simple life can be built almost entirely out of the second list.
Why do ordinary moments feel like they don't count?
Partly because you expect to remember them, and you mostly won't. Ting Zhang and colleagues had people write down everyday things, like a recent conversation, and read them back months later. They enjoyed it more than they had guessed, and that gap was bigger for ordinary moments than for special ones. Write one ordinary thing down tonight, and read it again in a few months.
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Sources
- Bhattacharjee & Mogilner (2014). Happiness from ordinary and extraordinary experiences. Journal of Consumer Research, 41(1), 1-17. doi.org/10.1086/674724
- Zhang, Kim, Brooks, Gino & Norton (2014). A “present” for the future: The unexpected value of rediscovery. Psychological Science, 25(10), 1851-1860. doi.org/10.1177/0956797614542274
- Kasser & Ryan (1996). Further examining the American dream: Differential correlates of intrinsic and extrinsic goals. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 22(3), 280-287. doi.org/10.1177/0146167296223006
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