Questions about feeling stuck

Answers to questions people type in when they feel stuck, with the research behind each one. Search, or pick a topic.

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Topics

Feeling stuckWhy people get stuck in life, and how common it is. · 12 questions
ChoicesWhat to do when you don't know what you want, or can't choose. · 8 questions
Work and studyQuestions about jobs and studies that don't fit anymore. · 4 questions
MotivationNo energy to start, and putting things off. · 11 questions
WorryOverthinking the future, and thoughts that keep going round. · 7 questions
Small stepsFinding the next step when you do not know where you are going. · 14 questions

All questions

How do I get motivated to study?Why studying is easy to put off, which study methods have the best evidence behind them, and how to set up a start you can manage every day.
Why do I procrastinate going to bed?Why the evening is hard to end, what research calls bedtime procrastination, and one plan to get to bed closer to the time you meant to.
What if I choose the wrong career?Why the regret you fear is often bigger than the regret you get, what people regret most, and how to test a career before you commit to it.
How do I stop being a perfectionist?The two sides of perfectionism in research, why it goes together with putting things off, and a small way to practise doing something well enough.
Is it okay to have an ordinary life?What research says about happiness from ordinary days, why small moments count for more than they seem, and how to tell your own wish from outside pressure.
How do I stop being jealous of other people's success?Why someone else's success can sting, the two kinds of envy researchers found, and how to turn the feeling into one small step of your own.
Should I give up on my goal?When letting go of a goal is okay, why quitting something you put a lot into feels so hard, and what research says helps after you stop.
How do I know if I'm on the right path?Why you can rarely know in advance, what research says about how much people still change, and how to test your path in a small way.
How do I stop being so hard on myself?Why the harsh voice in your head rarely helps, what research on self-compassion and self-forgiveness found, and one small way to answer it.
Why do I give up so easily?Why one missed day can turn into quitting, what research says about broken streaks and being hard on yourself, and what to do right after a slip.
Is it okay to be a late bloomer?What a late bloomer is, what research on scientists, artists and founders says about when people do their best work, and one way to start now.
How do you decide when both options are bad?Why a choice between two bad options is so hard to make, what research says about waiting and about choices you can undo, and one way to pick.
Why does my job feel meaningless?Why work can feel pointless even when it matters to someone, what research says about meaning at work, and a small change to try before you quit.
How do I reflect on the past year?Questions to look back on your year, what research says about writing it down, and how a look back helps you plan the next year better.
What do I do when my plans fall apart?What research says about setbacks, why a new ten-year plan can wait, and one small way to find your next direction when a plan falls apart.
Are cold showers good for you?What research found about cold showers and stress, why 30 seconds is enough, who should skip them, and why there's no need to build up.
Why does everyone have their life together except me?Why other people's lives look more sorted than yours, what research says about the struggles people hide, and what helps when you feel alone in it.
How do I find my passion?Why passion usually grows while you do something, why searching for one hidden passion can backfire, and how to start with a bit of curiosity.
How do I plan my day?Why a short day plan works better than a full one, how to plan a day with nothing fixed in it, and what to do when the plan falls apart.
How many New Year's resolutions should I make?Why one resolution with a plan tends to beat a long list, where to start if you want to change everything, and what to do with the rest.
Why do I never finish what I start?Why the middle of a task is where most people stall, why the finish only pulls once it's in sight, and how to get through the middle.
What if I feel like I wasted my 20s?Why looking back at a decade shows mostly missed chances, what people regret most, and how to use the regret for one small next step.
Why am I afraid of success?What research found about fear of success, what people say it sounds like, and one question to try.
Is it normal to not know what to do after college?Why not knowing what comes after school or college makes sense, what happens to your days, and one small way to start.
Why do I make plans and then not follow through?Why intending and doing are further apart than they seem, what a plan needs to help a little more, and what to do if you plan a lot.
How do I stop seeking approval from others?Why doing things mainly for approval wears thin, what research on choosing for yourself found, and a small way to begin.
Why don't I feel happier after getting what I wanted?Why something you wanted starts to feel normal, what research on getting used to things found, and what slows it down.
How do I start exercising when I don't feel like it?What one short bout of moving does for your mood, why it doesn't have to be hard, and how to start when you don't feel like it at all.
Which breathing exercise should I try?Want to calm down with your breath? What a study comparing breathing exercises found, what a cyclic sigh is, and how long an exercise needs to take.
Does journaling help?What research found about writing things down, why writing on its own often does little, and a way to journal that ties it to something you did.
How do I stop scrolling?Why scrolling is hard to stop, whether cutting down works better than quitting, and one small change you can make to your phone today.
How do I set goals for myself?How to set a goal you will actually do, what to do when you don't know what you want yet, and what research says about planning and tracking.
What does dopamine do for motivation?What dopamine does for motivation, why a dopamine detox or 30 day reset does not work, and what helps when your phone keeps pulling at you.
Why am I so afraid of failing?Why failing can feel like a verdict about who you are, why we expect it to hurt longer than it does, and how to test that with one small step.
Does the two-minute rule work?What the two-minute rule is, what research says about starting small, and what to do when two minutes still feels like too much.
Why do I always choose instant gratification?Why what feels good now wins from what you want later, what dopamine has to do with it, and how to change the moment it tips.
How do I find out what my values are?How to find out what matters to you: why choosing works better than a list, what a gap in your life tells you, and one small step to take.
Why does a new year feel like a fresh start?What the fresh start effect is, why a new date makes starting easier, whether you need to wait for January, and what to do when the new year feels heavy.
How do I become more disciplined?What research on self-control found: why disciplined people resist less often, why willpower does not run out like a battery, and where to start.
How do I choose a good New Year's resolution?What a Swedish study of 1,066 people found about resolutions that last a year, how specific to make yours, and where to find ideas.
How long does it take to form a habit?Why there is no fixed number of days for a new habit, what a study of 96 people found, and what to do after a skipped day.
How do I build a daily routine?Build a daily routine from one fixed moment, why it gets harder once school or work stops, and how long before a new habit runs by itself.
How do I keep my New Year's resolutions?Why a new year makes starting easier, what research found about plans that last past January, and what to do on the day you skip one.
Why do I feel stuck in a rut?In a rut, every day looks the same and nothing seems to change. Why habits keep it going, what research found, and one small place to start.
Why do I feel behind in life?Feeling behind usually comes from comparing, with others or with an age you think things should happen. What research found, and a first step.
Why do I keep putting things off?You put off what feels unpleasant, pays off later or seems too hard. What research found, what to do after a day of putting off, and how to start.
Should I change careers?Try the new work in small ways before you quit. How to test it, why letting go goes better with something new, and what happens after a switch.
How do I stop overthinking my future?Give your worries a set half hour a day and write them down in between. How to do it, what studies found, and when to see your doctor.
What's my next step?Your next step is one small try you can undo. Five steps to find it, why trying tells you more than thinking, and one thing for today.
Why do I have no motivation?Motivation often comes after you start. Five common reasons it goes missing, how to start before you feel like it, and when to see your doctor.
What is a quarter-life crisis?A period in your twenties or early thirties when life stops feeling right. What it looks like, its two forms, its four phases and how common it is.
Why can't I make decisions?You get indecisive when something specific is in the way, such as information you are missing or fear of choosing wrong. Research names four kinds of it.
Why do I feel lost?Feeling lost often starts when something that gave your days direction ends. Five kinds of not knowing, each with its own first step.
What should I do with my life?You find out mostly by trying. Start with what matters to you on an ordinary day, narrow it to two options, and test one in a small way.
Why do I feel stuck in life?People get stuck for many reasons: work that no longer fits, no way in, school that ended, comparing, being worn out. Ten common ones, with a first step.

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